7 Habits of Highly Successful Teens
(Habit 5)
5. Seek first to understand, and then
to be Understood
Because most people don’t listen very
well, one of the great frustrations in life is that many don’t feel understood.
This habit will ensure your teen learns the most important communication skill
there is: active listening.
Why is this habit the key to
communication? It’s because the deepest need of human heart is to be
understood. Everyone wants to be respected and valued for who they are--a
unique, one-of-kind, never-to-be-cloned individual. People won’t expose their
top middles unless they feel it, however, they will tell you more than you may
want to hear. People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you
care.
Listen with your eyes, heart, and
ears. 7 percent of communication is contained in the words we use. The rest
comes from body language (53 percent) and how we say words, or the tone and
feeling reflected in our voice (40 percent).
Most people are eager to talk and had
rather talk than listen. We have one mouth and two ears. This means we should
listen twice as much as we talk. We actually learn more while listening rather
than we talk. Learn to listen and listen to learn.
Listen. Really listen, for
understanding.
Seek first to understand then to be
understood--LISTEN.
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